I need a holiday

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I’m late with this week’s escaping the 9-5 post again and I have others that I meant to write and I haven’t yet. I think I need to just face the fact that I will never be one of those bloggers who can schedule posts in advance and post set things on set days. Not sure I want to be anyway.

I’m just in need of a little whinge. Bear with me.

I had a horrible day yesterday. And the day before that and maybe the day before that too. The kids are being ‘challenging’ lately. Kiran had a total meltdown the other day – a tantrum on a scale that dwarfed any of Maya’s tantrums (and if you know Maya, you’ll know that’s saying something). I’d gone next door with the kids and Kiran was having fun collecting flowers from the floor but I needed to go back as I’d left the stove on. He didn’t want to go so I just picked him up screaming and took him back. he then continued to scream. and scream. and scream. Distraction wasn’t working, ignoring him wasn’t working, he didn’t want anything. I’m always scared to put Kiran down when he’s having a tantrum as he bashes his head off things but I tried momentarily to put him on the bed and he just reached up for me screeching “mama! mama!”. He was obviously terrified too and just couldn’t stop himself – he clung to me trembling but hitting me and biting me at the same time. He was screaming so hard, he could hardly breathe. This continued for maybe half an hour, maybe an hour, I’m not sure until he slowly started to calm down. I on the other hand was a nervous wreck by the time that made got back and Maya was crying too (for attention).

Maya has been so naughty lately and seemingly only with me. She throws her food (and Kiran’s) on the floor – we’re talking whole plates here, stamps on my laptop with her shoes on, pulls all the clothes I just folded out of the cupboard and yesterday she looked me in the eye and proceeded to wee on the floor inside.

Work has been going well (apart from the fact I’m doing too much of it and still not earning enough) but I’ve had some terrible days with that too recently. I just sent a client to an article that I’d written about the wrong person – it was meant to be her sister. And just yesterday a series of 5 blog posts I’d sent off on a tricky subject that required a lot of research were apparently not right. I’d misinterpreted the instructions somehow. No idea how I’m going to fix that one without starting again. Sigh.

It’s cold and grey and drizzling in Ubud at the moment. Just like being back in the UK.

So yes, I need a holiday. Preferably without children. It’s my and Made’s birthday coming up later this month so I’m hoping we can escape for a couple of days (although no chance of living Kiran just yet and if I can’t leave them both I won’t take just one). For now I’m just hanging in there.

Please send chocolate and wine!

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6 Responses to “I need a holiday”

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  1. Maria says:

    Are you allowed to have an in-house babysitter? They’re like $100-150/month but you will have PLENTY of time to do your work and have some “me time”. It will take so much stress off of hour shoulders 😉

  2. Celeste says:

    Oh no.. I hope things pick up soon because that sounds rough 🙁 Have lots of virtual chocolate and wine.. Xx

  3. Rachel says:

    We had one for a couple of months but it didn’t really work out. I think it’s hard to find a good one and I’ve heard so many horror stories, I feel nervous about handing over care of my children to someone I don’t know. We decided that for now my husband would watch them in the morning while I worked and then I would take over in the afternoon. It’s kind of working, I just need to be a bit more efficient with my time to get more done. Also maybe because they’re kind of cranky by the afternoon that doesn’t help and maybe resenting me a bit for working?

  4. Maria says:

    That is sooo great your husband is willing to watch the kids while you work, most (not all!!!) Indonesian dads refuse to do that. Hope things will work out for y’all. I can imagine how tough it is, but hang in there! Kids will grow 😉 Beside, it’s worth it!
    Well, not all sitters are terrible, it’s a matter of luck. A friend of mine in Sanur has a great one for almost 4 years.

  5. Rachel says:

    yes I know! It’s taken a while to get to this point and he’s still not 100% happy about it at times but a vast improvement on a year ago anyway. I know there are great babysitters out there, I just think they’ve all been snapped up already :p

  6. Omg, I thought that Stella’s tantrums were bad. This sounds like a whole different galaxy!! And the worst part of the story is that good chocolate and drinkable wine are unplayable in Indo. Xo